This past week I was extremely blessed to get to work with some really amazing clients who have already left an imprint on my heart. I wanted to share a few lessons I have personally learned through my lens as a healing arts practitioner. I'm noticing that when I really open myself up to receive messages, they flow through me with ease.
As many of my students, friends and family know, I have had an ongoing battle with anxiety. Learning ways to cope with it as I've gotten older has certainly made it easier to live with, but I get little reminders here and there that it still exists inside my body. Yoga, self care and nurturing my inner child are some tools I can reach to when I feel the physical symptoms start to creep up. Sometimes, however, the nagging voice of my anxiety urges me to act too quickly, wanting things to be tied up neatly with a bow.
I'll share a small example of this and how one of my dear clients mirrored to me how patience and taking time to pause before making decisions can really be to my benefit.
I knew my car insurance payment was due in June and I had calculated in my head how much it would be and was totally prepared commit to the 6 month premium. My client happens to be an insurance agent and had told me that if I wanted him to, he would happily check to see if I could get a better deal with another company. I told him yes, but part of me was reluctant to switch for some reason...having been a State Farm customer for a long and having not such a great driving record from when I was younger. Part of me didn't want him to see my driving record because I was ashamed...and so I mailed State Farm a check without first allowing my client to do some research for me.
I told him what I had done and he was surprised. He said, "Brooke, your payment isn't due for another month, why the rush?" I told him that I like to have things taken care of at once. That I didn't want him to see my driving record and that it gives me anxiety to not secure every little thing. I have to express gratitude to this part of myself that is on top of things, but I also realize that there is undoubtedly a need to balance this out and to slow down.
He asked me to just come to his office and he could do some research and see if I could get a better deal and he did! I found me a better option with a good company and options to get further discounts over time. So I learned from this that sometimes when I think I'm being 'on top of it...' I'm actually potentially being 'over the top.' And also, who cares if my driving record is less than perfect? I'm ready to let go of any shame over my distractability.
Meditation is helpful for this. When I take time to pause and breathe, I give myself much more space to consider all my options. I might have anxiety brewing under the surface, and yes sometimes it is stronger than other times, but I am learning that there are powerful tools and different ways of being. I don't have to be in such a rush to tie things up all the time and I can trust myself to not let anything fall through the cracks because I am a fierce, responsible woman.
Another lesson came from a client the other day who does energy work and is quite a bit older than myself. He was in the Air Force when he was younger and had sustained a lot of very painful injuries that required surgery. He has a screw in his neck and was even electrocuted on the job a decade ago leaving him with a lot of nerve damage.
I asked him if he had any one piece of advice to give to a younger person, what would it be and he said, "take care of your body while you're young." He informed me that he was regretful about the way he mistreated his body over the years and feels, now much older than he actually is. We think we are invincible in youth, and trust me...I used to believe this for myself up until just recently in fact, but now with my business, so clearly revolving around self care, I am much more sensitive and attuned to how I treat my body and I want to do so with respect. Thank you Open Circle Healing.
I'm learning to open myself up to all the valuable lessons in this life and feel blessed and grateful to have little mirrors all around me urging me to slow down, to not be in a rush and to take care of my body.